top atheist quotes (total: 16012)
| author |
atheist quote |
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Nim |
Taoism:
Shit happens.
Buddhism:
If shit happens, it's not really shit.
Islam:
If shit happens, it's the will of Allah.
Protestantism:
Shit happens because you don't work hard enough.
Judaism:
Why does this shit always happen to us?
Hinduism:
This shit happened before.
Catholicism:
Shit happens because you're bad.
Hare Krishna:
Shit happens rama rama.
T.V. Evangelism:
Send more shit.
Atheism:
No shit.
Jehova's Witness:
Knock knock, shit happens.
Hedonism:
There's nothing like a good shit happening.
Christian Science:
Shit happens in your mind.
Agnosticism:
Maybe shit happens, maybe it doesn't.
Rastafarianism:
Let's smoke this shit.
Existentialism:
What is shit anyway?
Stoicism:
This shit doesn't bother me. |
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Nim |
Church ahead, please remove brain. |
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Nim |
All religions are basically the same, guilt, with different holidays. |
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Nim |
The Bible cannot be written by God because it is not perfect. It is not perfect because it contradicts itself. It contradicts itself because it says to stone rebellious children to death, but it also says not to ever kill. |
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Nim |
Atheist (world population) percent over time: 1900-0.2% 1970-5% 2000-10% 2009-16%. Now look at those numbers and tell me that atheists aren't growing.  |
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| Gen. Forkspoon |
If God is infinite in knowledge and goodness, then why would he have his son commit suicide, only to correct mistakes he blames on faulty humans he designed. |
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Mark Twain |
Deep down in me I knowed it was a lie, and He knowed it. You can't pray a lie - I found that out. ~Mark Twain
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Stuart Bushell |
Those who see the hand of God in creation turn the wonderful thing that is life, and the natural world around us, into nothing more than a puppet show. |
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Ferdinand Magellan |
"The church says the earth is flat but I have seen its shadow on the moon, and I have more confidence even in a shadow than in the church |
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Spencer Herron |
Ask a hundred Christians what God wants and you will receive one hundred differing answers. |
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Stuart Bushell |
If you do believe in God and pray to him you do realise you are on first name terms with the world’s first, and most prolific, serial killer. |
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| Banana_hammock |
Dear God, please save me from your followers. |
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| Tyler Hausen |
Just because I don't believe in God, doesn't mean I'm immoral. I don't need a higher being to tell me how to be good, I'm smarter than that. |
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| Dr. Idel Dreimer www.lumpenbangenpiano.com |
Those who embrace the nonsense of religion must reject the sense of evidence, and the evidence of their senses. |
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| Baron von Knifty |
The real drug war in this country is misdirected. It should be declared on the church, the most harmful hallucinogen of all.
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Will Evo |
At the end of the day, I can prove the things I believe, and you cannot, end of story. |
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| Baron von Knifty |
Why is it the media never reports when an Atheist is saved from disaster or death?
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| Baron von Knifty |
Doesn’t it seem suspicious that with all those supposed in-your-face miracles performed 2,000 years ago, none are happening today, now that we have skeptical, questioning scientists to test them?
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| Carolina Jiménez |
I don't believe in god for the same reason I don't believe in trolls, fairies, santa claus, unicorns or the loch ness monster. There's no reasonable reasons to believe in any of them. Some other humans made them up.
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| mansell t butcher |
Science can disprove 99.99% of everything to do with 'god' but the creationists hang on to that 00.01% as truth!! you do the maths! |
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| Colin Bridge |
Countless thousands of those who died in the service of their country, at war, were atheists. How dare the religious turn ceremonies of remembrance into church services with such mutterings as: "They are now with the Lord" and "God called them home." |
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| Cedrik Definney |
Faith allows one to accept propositions that reason would NEVER allow. |
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| Calliope Muse |
If there were actual proof of the existence of a god or gods, there would be no need for "faith" in their existence. |
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| The Freethinker’s Textbook Part II |
For centuries the leaders of Christian thought spoke of women as a necessary evil, and the greatest saints of the Church are those who despise women the most. |
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H. L. Mencken |
Religion is fundamentally opposed to everything I hold in veneration - courage, clear thinking, honesty, fairness, and, above all, love of the truth. |
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| -Arthur C. Clarke, author |
Religion is a byproduct of fear. For much of human history, it may have been a necessary evil, but why was it more evil than necessary? Isn't killing people in the name of God a pretty good definition of insanity?" |
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| Oscar Wilde - [1854-1900] Irish author and Playwri |
"When I think of all the harm the Bible has done, I despair of ever writing anything equal to it." |
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| Sinclair Lewis |
When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag, carrying a cross. |
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| James Dobson |
Those who control what young people are taught, and what they experience — what they see, hear, think, and believe — will determine the future course for the nation. |
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| Greta X |
Religion is the comfort blanket for humanity in it's infancy. One day we may learn to leave such childishness behind and deal with the world with courage instead of clinging to our comforters. |
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xenofex and shelley |
If he is infinitely good, what reason should we have to fear him? If he is infinitely wise, why should we have doubts concerning our future? If he knows all, why warn him of our needs and fatigue him with our prayers? If he is everywhere, why erect temples to him? If he is just, why fear that he will punish the creatures that he has, filled with weaknesses? If grace does everything for them, what reason would he have for recompensing them? If he is all-powerful, how offend him, how resist him? If he is reasonable, how can he be angry at the blind, to whom he has given the liberty of being unreasonable? If he is immovable, by what right do we pretend to make him change his decrees? If he is inconceivable, why occupy ourselves with him? IF HE HAS SPOKEN, WHY IS THE UNIVERSE NOT CONVINCED? If the knowledge of a God is the most necessary, why is it not the most evident and the clearest
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| Anonymous |
Since the Bible and the church are obviously mistaken in telling us where we came from, how can we trust them to tell us where we are going? |
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| Unknown |
You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs - though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend eternity in an infinite hell of suffering. And yet you consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving...
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| M. Brickstocke |
I’m sick of religious people forcing their children to define themselves by their parents’ faith. A four-year-old is no more a Christian than he is a member of the Postal Workers’ union.
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Stuart Vealey |
If the Bible is this perfect text, wouldn't you expect perfect clarity from it? Why then does it read like a hodge-podge written by a bunch of misogynistic, ignorant, superstitious and fearful village elders? |
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Alan Harvey |
I don't know what all the fuss is about Bishop Williamson denying the holocaust ever happened. Every bishop on Earth is making a career out of denying reality. |
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| Thomas Frederick Lim |
If you prayed for light in the room and still think it's dark, perhaps you should switch on the lights. |
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Neil Hurle |
I don't need the fear of hell to make me a good person. Priest, you're out of a job. |
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Holy Goats |
Why would any god value your ability to deny reality over your ability to think logically? |
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Hugh Jedake |
A billion people can all scream the same lie... it still won't magically turn it into the truth. |
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Sperm of Santa |
If YOU had god-like powers, wouldn't you end wars, suffering, plagues, poverty, mental illness, etc.? Would YOU be bothered about people worshipping you? No? Seems obvious that if god exists, he's not as nice as us, eh? |
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| unknown |
Anyone who needs a book to find their soul is truly lost. |
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Richard Dawkins |
It is ridiculous to say you believe in something just because we cannot prove that it doesn't exist. For example if i was to say there was a teapot that was orbiting around the Sun, but it was to small to see with our telescopes, it would be stupid to say 'I am prepared to believe in the teapot because you cannot disprove it' |
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Richard Dawkins |
It is futile to use a creator to explain how we came to be, when it raises a bigger question, who created the creator? |
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| David Smalley |
You will not have an opportunity to make a difference after death; so be someone's guardian angel now. |
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| Bugsy |
My best friend has been "born again". She used to approach every subject with an open mind... now she approaches every subject with an open mouth. Shame, I used to think she was intelligent. |
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| Steve Meyer |
Faith is a lollipop for suckers! |
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Alan Harvey |
God gets angry and jealous? Well he doesn't sound perfect to me. Or could it be that the ones who pretend he exists imagine fantasy figures with faults like their own? |
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| Nanni* |
If I were a God i Would check on my creation once in a while. |
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Christopher Hitchens |
"Monotheistic religion is a plagiarism of a plagiarism of a hearsay of a hearsay, of an illusion of an illusion, extending all the way back to a fabrication of a few non-events." |
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more atheist quotes
recently added quotes
| author |
atheist quote |
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Anthony W. Allsop (Genesis) (admin) |
"Do you, John Doe, take this deity to love honour and obey, so help you God, or else he will beat the shit out of you?" |
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Anthony W. Allsop (Genesis) (admin) |
Why do some folk feel the need to have to read their holy books over and over or at least have them read to them?
I only had to read Charles Darwin's book 'The Origin of Species' once and I was convinced that the holy books had it all wrong. |
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Pat Simons |
If you subtract everything theologians make up out of thin air from their body of work, you don't have a whole lot left. |
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Anthony W. Allsop (Genesis) (admin) |
Gods' are bollocks that should be castrated from your mind to prevent them breeding. |
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EA Miller |
When a religious leader exclaims, “Have faith!†all I hear is “please don’t examine the facts, just believe me!†|
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EA Miller |
Religion is a guise used to spread narrow-minded, dangerous agendas. |
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EA Miller |
Why would a god create a vast universe with an insane amount of stars and planets, but only make rules for one planet with one star filled with slightly intelligent apes? |
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EA Miller |
If the mass-murdering god of the Bible is “loveâ€, then black is white, up is down, and all politicians are honest. |
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Anthony W. Allsop (Genesis) (admin) |
Over the centuries there have been many occasions where the men in frocks were convinced that THEY knew better than the men and women in smocks. |
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Anthony W. Allsop (Genesis) (admin) |
Make an effort this Sunday and join your local church. WARNING: May contain nuts. |
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